Dearest Gentle Reader, this Friday brings dispatches of such gravity, such audacity, and such bureaucratic absurdity that This Author's pen has scarcely kept pace with the hour. A tale of invisible survivors, a broadening investigation into a most prominent Norfolk gentleman, and the particular torment awaiting those who thought escaping to the Continent might offer relief - all await within.

Dearest Gentle Reader, this Thursday brings Muscovite pilots playing aerial games of dare within six metres of an unarmed RAF aircraft, a former Health Secretary announcing a leadership coup over podcast, and two hapless walkers undone by the streams of North Britain - all while free omnibuses are hailed as the great salvation of the age. This Author has opinions on every last one of these matters, and not a single one shall be left unexamined.

Dearest Gentle Reader, this Wednesday brings a trio of contradictions so delicious that This Author scarcely knows where to begin - a government that begs grocers for mercy, loosens the very sanctions it swore to tighten, and finds a certain royal duchess once again in the orbit of a man making very free with palace connections. Pull up a chair; the kettle need not be on long.