Dearest Gentle Reader, this Wednesday has delivered a king addressing foreign legislators, a government scrambling to avoid a most inconvenient inquiry, and a face cream making promises it had absolutely no business making. This Author has opinions on all of it - and perhaps a raised eyebrow or two to spare.

Dearest Gentle Reader, this Tuesday finds royalty addressing foreign assemblies, landlords weeping over empty coffers, and oil barons quietly toasting a war they did not start. This Author has observations - some grave, some wickedly arch, and one or two that shall require a steadying cup of something strong before you proceed.

Dearest Gentle Reader, this Monday brings royalty venturing into uncertain territory abroad, a river reduced to something a chicken would blush to admit responsibility for, and a Kenyan gentleman who has made a mockery of the very concept of two hours. This Author has also received intelligence on the state of the nation's health that is rather less diverting - and a tale of courage from the Northern Province that demands every reader's attention.