Dearest Gentle Reader, this Monday has furnished your devoted Author with a Prime Minister making two very large arguments simultaneously, a Chancellor staring into a thirty-five billion pound abyss, and a Viscount who has apparently rewritten the entire legal framework of these islands on a single sheet of paper. There is also the small matter of a rooftop swindle so prevalent it has become the nation's most fashionable crime - and a tiger, who remains, one is relieved to report, entirely at liberty.

Dearest Gentle Reader, today's dispatches bring a single syllable of foreign policy, a £1.3 billion campaign of lies, and a farming scheme that vanished faster than one's composure at an Oasis ticket sale. This Author also has thoughts on black velvet jackets, pearl earrings, and what it means to inherit a situation - whether one is a prime minister or merely the recipient of a slightly damp umbrella.

Dearest Gentle Reader, this Sunday has furnished This Author with a researcher who believes artificial intelligence may shortly kill us all, a political party that received more money in two days than every other party managed in an entire year, and a motorist in the Principality who drove half a mile down a coastal footpath and escaped through their own boot. Whether any of these developments ought to alarm or merely amuse you is, as always, a matter This Author shall leave entirely to your superior judgement.