Dearest Gentle Reader, this Sunday brings a royal security drama that would make even the most seasoned novelist blush, a football farewell signed in fresh ink, and a golden medal that fetched a sum quite sufficient to fund a small principality. This Author has opinions on all of it - and she is not, for once, keeping them to herself.

Dearest Gentle Reader, this Saturday delivers a most peculiar mixture of the scorching, the scandalous, and the strangely poignant - including a royal reunion four years in the making, a record shattered for the third day running, and a castle full of sculptures that even their owner refuses to claim. This Author has opinions on all of it, and very little intention of keeping them to herself.

Dearest Gentle Reader, this very Thursday has delivered a political pantomime so perfectly constructed one suspects the actors rehearsed it. Lady Reeves endorses the man expected to demote her, Lord Trump delivers a verdict so magnificently unhelpful it proves his opponent's point entirely, and somewhere in North Britain, an entire nation squints at a statistical table with the expression of a person who has been here before and knows precisely how it ends - yet cannot quite bring themselves to look away.