Breakfasting this morning, This Author paused over her kedgeree to read of a Bradford solicitor who had devised a scheme so brazen, so magnificently impudent, that one’s toast went quite cold in admiration before the…

Dearest Gentle Reader, this Tuesday has furnished your devoted correspondent with a Chancellor who will not be moved, a Prime Minister who has declared war upon car park extortion, and a banking outage that left eighty million customers collectively patting their empty pockets. The details, one promises, are even more diverting than they sound - not least the matter of a Newport school bus that set out this morning with a roof and arrived without one.

Dearest Gentle Reader, this Monday has arrived bearing gifts of the most alarming variety - a constable shot in the foot, a nation's children declared in a state of emergency, and a bomb threat to one hundred and sixty schools that turned out, thankfully, to be entirely fictional. Whether the same can be said for the property market's delusions is a question this Author addresses with considerable relish within.