Dearest Gentle Reader, this Saturday has delivered grief, absurdity, and a duchess in negotiations for a role that this Author can only describe as divinely well-timed - all before the afternoon sun has properly warmed the Cotswolds. A man pulled from the sea repaid his rescuers in a manner that left three hundred and twenty-nine fellow passengers rather inconvenienced, and the nation's students have made a financial calculation that speaks poorly of someone - though quite who, this Author leaves to your discernment.