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Dearest Gentle Reader,
What a week it has been. This Author has observed with mounting bewilderment as the Kingdom has descended into a state of such comprehensive chaos that one might reasonably wonder whether the entire nation has collectively misplaced its faculties. Where does one even begin?
The week commenced with GPS Jamming, and the Price of a Toddler’s Sunscreen: Monday Has Much to Answer For, a dispatch that should have served as a warning of the absurdities to follow. By Tuesday, Heat, Heartbreak, and a Motorhome Most Foul: Tuesday’s Dispatch from a Kingdom in Disarray had introduced us to a motorhome most larcenously acquired. This criminal conveyance proved so memorable that it reappeared in Silence, Sabotage, and Soaring Bills: Wednesday Delivers Its Customary Array of Horrors – as though the Kingdom could not bear to let it fade from public consciousness.
Thursday brought Ten Deaths, One Giant’s Indecency, and a Television Show That Has Frankly Gone Too Far, while Friday gifted us When the Kingdom Cannot Keep Its Own Safe Upon a Night Out. By Saturday, we had progressed to Thirty Thousand Emails, and Nobody Thought to Mention It, a discovery suggesting someone’s filing system requires rather urgent attention. This Author concluded the week’s tour de force with The Embezzled Husband, the Resurgent Fungus, and the Man Who Talked Too Much.
The pattern is unmistakable: governmental incompetence, criminal enterprise, and nature itself have conspired to render the nation unmanageable. This Author shall require considerably more than a cool compress to recover.