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Dearest Gentle Reader,
What a week it has been. This Author confesses herself quite overwhelmed by the sheer audacity on display across the Kingdom and beyond. One hardly knows where to begin when the scandals arrange themselves with such theatrical precision.
The week commenced with files, fines, and rather colourful language, progressed through espionage, debts, and motorhomes of questionable provenance, and somehow managed to accommodate helicopters, puffins, and the rather grim arithmetic of retirement. By Thursday, matters had escalated to biological miracles and lapel badge controversies, whilst Friday delivered royal sub-lettings and mathematical torture devices.
Yet all of this pales before the twin revelations that Saturday and Sunday bestowed upon us. A Vice-President of the American Colonies who cannot resist offering his opinions, a television librarian bid a fond farewell, a lottery winner robbed of justice, and most splendidly, a kebab scandal and a royal wedding that restored This Author’s faith in happy endings, if one could overlook the fraudulent mutton.
The pattern is unmistakable: incompetence pairs with audacity, whilst somewhere in the margins, a puffin seeks promotion and a puffin’s white-board in Nottingham silently judges us all.
Yours in bewilderment,
This Author